Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
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