There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize
