I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
