What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
