Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
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