i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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