it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
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