oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
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