Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize