if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
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