So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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