But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
The power of my boobs compel you
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
