Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
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