yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
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She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
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I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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