Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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