her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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