sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
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