I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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