that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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