Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
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pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
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I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
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