help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So much rum. So many feels.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦🏼♀️
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize