belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize