had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize
