the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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