just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
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You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
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Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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