Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
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He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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