If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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