She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
