I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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