Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
