what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Randomize