miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
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and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
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Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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