i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
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We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
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Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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