I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
