I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
vagina is talking i cant
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
