I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
