3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Randomize
