Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize