i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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