So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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