fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
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