Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
