Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
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