She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it