i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Randomize