I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize