He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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