Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
