only if we run a train.
done.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
