He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Randomize
