I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
You are a booty call, not a friend.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Randomize
