I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
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