I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
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I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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